So its been awhile..

I decided that I would start blogging once again for the family I don't get to see very often..

What's New:

I started Dental Assisting school last month & I absolutely love it! The teeth are very complicated but absolutely interesting! Hayden is now 2, walking, talking, attitude and a spiting image of me. Absolutely loves her Grandpa. (Another same as her mommy!) Gunnyr is 1 & is full of life and just a spiting image of his daddy. Loooks and Acts absolutely nothing of me.. I swear I dont think I was involved in the DNA of that child!

We have had lots of little ones born and conceived since I was on here! First was Easton Joseph and then Brenner Owen & next is my little nephew Leyton Macoy who will be here by the end of June.. so soon!!! We can not wait. We have become quite the Partridge Family, if I might say so myself!

Life has been rather quiet lately with school. I am going full time so its Monday thru Friday with my free time being only around the weekends! Most of our free time is spent with all the family doing FUN in the SUN days or just simply by the pool! It's very refreshing!

As much as I would like to keep this very happy go lucky.. We lost an amazing man this past week. His name was Johnny Hudson. And he has been apart of my life since I was about 2 or 3. He was one of dads very good friends and close enough to my family to call him an uncle. He worked for TECO (Tampa Electric CO.) Where he was hurt on the job and passed away the next day. My heart hurts for his wife Jennifer & his young daughters Payton & Jillian. I love them all & will keep them in my prayers and I ask you to do so too!

Johnny, you are an amazing man and I can not believe your life was cut so short. But they say that the good die young & more and more lately I am becoming a believer in this. I love you and you will be missed dearly! I will see you on the otherside!

For today I think I will be finished.. the end made me very sad.. xo

Its been almost 3 weeks..

Since I last posted a blog on this site. What can I say two children, a crappy laptop & life keep me a little busy sometimes?! I am feeling like I am once again on the outskirts of certain relationships again & not so much apart of the that whole circle anymore but thankfully though I have a great friend base that I don't get to see very often but they do remind me to get away from life every once in awhile! I have been taking Hayden to the pool lately to work on the swimming like a big girl situation and I must say.. HOLY crap I think it scares me worse than her not knowing how to swim at all. She officially walked right into the beach today.. completely by herself, no floaties and insisted on swimming solo.. I was about 5 seconds away from a severe heart attack.. but she did amazing..She did her first sleep over a couple of weekends ago with her Grandpa.. who was super excited to call and tell me that she "pooped in her swimmy" in the pool.. LOL.. I don't know if it was excitement or pure "OMG" moment.. of the OH HELL why me?!?!?!? I laughed and asked if he had enough and I needed to pick up my walking, talking, poop machine..And of course I got the UH NO.. she is just fine. Along with that Grandpa also surprised me with two very blue gallons of paint and said here you go.. get the nursery finished.. I was covering the most disgusting color ever.. think.. green almost black army throw up.. yep you got it... :) Which has now been turned into 1/2 pink... 1/2 blue oasis. Pretty pink flowers and green polka dots and a Nautical retreat on the other half. Might I say.. 2 whole nights, 2 gallons of primer, 2 coats of primer later.. oh and dont let me forget... 2 coats of every color BUT the navy.. that took 4.. later I am very proud of myself. Its amazing! Gunnyr is officially not a little ball of nothing.. he is 24 1/2 inches long & 13 pounds and only 4 months.. Hayden is 22 pounds and 28 inches long at 16 months.. yep you aren't reading it wrong his is only 3.5 inches shorter than her.. I have a tall boy on my hands!! He is smiling a lot, has found his hands, sucks his thumbs.. attempting to roll over, cooing & making me absolutely over joyed with having the two of them! Hayden is a little more of a hand full now but it all goes with age. She now likes to tell you where your eyes are .. as if you don't know she also likes to locate them for you.. with a nice poke straight to your eyeball.. nevertheless.. life with these two is nothing short of astonishing.. I have a weightloss report .. I am about 3 pounds away from loosing 60 whole pounds. I feel great.. never better but I have been slacking a little. I am going to get back on my horse this week though. Because I still have some of the problem areas that I want to correct. (arms, tummy & thighs.) But I will say I went to the beach and I strutted my stuff in a two piece.. (keep in mind,, it was a far away beach.. no one there but old people & absolutely NO ONE that I would have known!!!!)

In hiding..

Well the past couple of days I have been in hiding. Redirecting most, if not all, of my time to my little ones. Hayden is really becoming her own lately and it really makes me sad sometimes. She is really starting to "talk". It isn't in our language but that known as baby gargle. You can understand her most of the time with things she always says.. luv u, juice, cuppie, mommy, daddy, bubby, bobo, tank ew, nite nite, eyes, nose, toes, button. But it seems like daily she makes me really turn around and think to myself.. did she really say that. Just like Monday night we were putting her to bed.. normal routine.. we ask if shes ready to go nite nite.. she responds NO.. yet shes attmepting to climb the stairs to get to her room.. upstairs we give a bath, put on pjs & read a book to her. Well Monday night was different. I just jokingly said ok say NITE NITE MOMMY.. and without a beat & clear as day..Hayden says NITE NITE MOMMY, uv u. I looked at Andy and he looked at me .. and I said OH MY. Andy then turns to her and says SAY NITE NITE DADDY.. she doesn't miss a beat... NOPE. LOL. I will not lie.. my heart was a little warm, with an awe feeling.. she loves me finally! LOL. I do know she loves me but from what seems like birth she has been what most of us girls are.. but times 10. Sometimes I felt like she hated me.. She would cry when he left, say dada ALL DAY. and say uh no to me about everything!.............. Well her knew thing is being a little mama herself. Grandpa bought her a babydoll.. Baby Alive to be exact.. (and I must say.. this doll pees & poops) Thank GOSH Hayden doesn't know that yet. She does realize she has a diaper on, has a bottle with milk & one with juice & has a spoon with medicine. Baby also has a baby thermometor.. which Hayden attempts to do up the butt.. (yeah, so shes seen me take her bubbys temp, rectal.. oops!) who knew she would do that? I have since noticing it this morning, taken her and Gunnyrs temps via armpit! Life around the house has been fun & nothingless than entertaining but life in the family has finally quieted down. Time heals all wounds, I guess. But who knows. Working tonight! And then meeting up with my friend Christina for a few rounds of boot scoot & boogieing! I was a little hesistant to go out again on a Thursday I don't want to be known as a bad mom or what not but Andy put it in one sentence that made me feel better, "You need to get out and be alone, you are with the kids all day and you need to get away to keep sane!" Who am I to disagree? :) Until Later.. xo

When I say..

that this is me unedited.. that is what I mean BUT I guess I still will ALWAYS have to clear what my intentions/feelings truely are. I made this site so that I could let go. I have recently seen a doctor about being stressed/nervous.. and feeling crazy! I have two very small children whom I love to death but they do stress me out. They both can make me a little on the edge so I have a little assistance.. with Zoloft. It takes a lot for me to write that on here because its something I hate to say because I certainly feel like a "failure". I feel like I can't handle my life.. or I should say I feel like if I tell people I am on it that people think that I can't handle my life.. I can I just need a little HELP! :)

My LAST BLOG.. says that "some are more maintence than others.." and it was apparently taken to heart and taken in COMPLETELY wrong.. wasn't at all pin pointed at ANYONE or TWO people .. it was PINNED at the WHOLE FAMILY! Saying that "some families" are more maintence than others.. included are my husband and I & our kids. It meant that our whole family needs a little more TLC to do ABSOLUTELY anything.. so word to the wise, for those that read this.. if you have QUESTIONS.. call the person writing this.. don't go talking about it amongst urself with others and getting completely pissed off about N O T H I N G!

:) This is weekend we went to Daytona.. I will write about that stressful vacation tonight as soon as I upload the pictures!! Until later.. xo.."FAMILY.. YOU CAN'T LIVE WITH THEM.. CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT THEM" either way YOU LOVE EM'

I've come to some realization..

That in life there is ABSOLUTLELY no way to make EVERYONE happy. This will be the last time I even try to plan anything as a "whole" family. It ALWAYS starts off with open skies, big hearts, great plans.. but ... always ends up with dark, gloomy skies just days before we leave. Like we are jinxed to not be able to go and make any plans without some obnoxious arguments and a absolute pissing match. I've come to realize some are just more maintenence than others. :) Anyways.. This weekend was a blast by far.. This is the first weekend ever.. well not ever.. but the first weekend in nearly two years that I have actually gone out with just the girls.. with out reasoning.. (like a bachlorette party or what not). I went on an actual 'girls nite out'... you know.. like what you hear the theme song.. GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN..This weekend has been filled with all Heather's.. Thursday was Heather M. night.. her and I went to high school together.. and then Heather L. & Heather S. and I all worked together at the wonderful shit hole called D.R. Horton. :) My girls night was nothing short of amazing.. line dancing, $12 all you can drink & a mechanical bull.. YEAH I NEVER GOT ON THERE.. I did say I would if they had a camera to capture my adventure.. but my Melon Balls, Kamakazi's, Buttery Nipples & Jolly Rancher shots.. did not give me enough liquid courage.. sorry girls :( ... Tonight I made a new recipe on my long list of "wants" .. it was chicken in pancake batter.. seasoned.. AMAZING.. but I was very scared so at last minute in the oven I threw some Italian dressing on it.. Because EVERYTHING tastes amazing baked in Italian dressing, I must say. So I guess I actually cheated.. I didn't make the real recipe. I made my own.. LOL.. Hayden & Gunnyr were amazing today as always.. Hayden has cut all four molars so she is officially not so grouchy now.. THANK GOODNESS!!! T-Minus 2 days we leave for vacation.. if you want to call it that.. 4 days hopefully filled with LOVE & Fun.. UNTIL NEXT TIME.. xo

Swim little Fishy, SWIM..

Living in Florida all of our little ones should know how to swim, when they are little. Hayden is just shy of 16 months and can not get enough of the water.. whether it be the pool, the beach or the tub. She is my little fishy. We started off with the baby rafts.. and that lasted about 3 times.. after that she wanted to be in the open water.. ALONE.. so we went and found level one floaties & ever since then she has been so happy. She kicks her legs, tries to move her arms (the floaties are almost longer than her whole arm!!) and she also has learned how to float on her back but of course with the "Hayden" flair.. LEGS CROSSED.. anyone who has been around Hayden knows she only sits on you or the floor with her legs properly crossed. So its only right that she crosses her legs while floating!! Such a proper little one, I might say! Well yesterday I took her to the pool, like I have been doing, atleast 3 times a week and she started jumping off the side.. and we even did some swimming and playing without the floaties.. a couple of underwater swimming fiascos but even still she was all about being in the water.. I am so proud..

:)

Hayden is officially going to be my short child and Gunnyr will be my taller one. He is only 11 weeks today and he is officially 24inches tall.. My daughter who is 16 months is only 28 inches tall.. OMG. He will be taller than her by 2!! And the "Are they twins questions?" shall begin!

:)

I decided to take off from my Tae Bo madness last night and go out with a friend to our local country club, THE BULL.. and do some line dancing.. all prepared in my sandals, jeans and tee.. LOL.. I am the friend everyone says. .ARE YOU SERIOUSLY WEARING FLIP FLOPS TO DANCE? umm yes! I can do anything in my flip flops, THANK YOU! Line dancing in a large facility with what seems like TONS of people.. makes you sweat.. burn calories, burn fat, tone muscles and not even know it! I feel wonderful today!!

:)

As for yesterdays current events.. RIP Farrah Fawcett... absolutely by far one of the most amazing, beautiful and greatest actresses of all time. She will truly be the angel she was here on earth in heaven! I just wish we would find a cure to cancer. It has hit to close to home for its own good to me. I lost my mother in law at a very young age of 41 to Breast..turned to Bone cancer. A cousin whom had numerous different cancers at the age of 29 and an Aunt who thankfully beat cancer. It has come to me too.. I have to be watched also because I have precancerous cells on my cervix. So I am monitored every 6 months in hopes that nothing comes of it. I want to be here for my children, I want to see my children grow, graduate high school, college and get married and have children of their own. Maybe this is looking to far into it but still.. theres alway a possibility.. And of course I have to comment on Michael Jackson.. yes yes he made great music at one point in time.. but he turned into a complete crazy person.. Who if he hadn't died yesterday adn you talked about him on Wednesday you would have commented on how he was a child molester and how he skipped out on jail due to this status and money.. im sorry I just don't get the "ICON" symbol people are saying.. Farrah Fawcett should be the breaking news.. not this creeper that molested little boys and got off scotch free. Personally I have a little boy and I feel for the little boys whom where touched or even around MJ long enough to be bothered by him. So yes MJ might have been the KING OF POP in the 80's early 90's before the wackiness now known to be him.. but hes turned into a cook, who waved a baby over a balcony.. REMEMBER THAT? well RIP MJ.. may you be turned back in the innocent black man you once were and not the bleach bound, plastic surgery disaster you became!

:)

Well Hayden seems to be getting hungry.. So I guess its time to make lunch and send her off for her nap.. hmmmm I see a little bit of quiet in my near future.. OR LAUNDRY.. lol.. GOSH it's never ending!!

Until Later..xoxo

2 mini cupcakes, a swig of sweet tea & a tiny handfull of chocolate covered raisins...

Gives you Hayden's version of an Indian Rain Dance.. 20 minutes long, leaving your abs feeling like you haven't worked out in years.. She by far can keep me entertained for hours :) especially on a sugar high.. studder stepping in circles, one arm up in the arm.. chanting oooohhhoooohhh.. LOL.. to freaking cute.. she makes me laugh again.. just thinking about it. And if I wasn't laughing so hard I might have thought to grab the video recorder.. ten steps away.. sorry.. forgot! The night is coming to an end.. speghetti is completely gone.. both kids are in bed and my house stayed cleaned for approx 10 minutes.. and all I can hear is the Tampa Bay Rays game in the background... And Andrew snoring. :) it's the little things in life that make it worth it! :)

This is week is going to be so much fun.. work tomorrow... well a call in tomorrow, off Friday and Both of my friends.. Heather M & Heather L are coming over.. one to go to the pool with me and the kids and the other to come and visit from GA with her kiddos! I can not wait. Andrew will be at the Rays game Friday night with his cousin, compliments for his dad's season tickets.. Saturday I work at night.. and Andy will be at the game again! HMM reminder.. find a babysitter.. LOL.. and Sunday I work again.. and MONDAY AND TUESDAY AND WEDS... hmm starting to sound like I have a job :) But I can't wait we are going to Daytona Beach come Thursday morning(July 2nd) with family.. LOTS of family to be exact.. Both brother in laws, a sister in law, a neice, 4 cousins, 3 second cousins.. did you count that.. thats 9 adults and 6 kids.. holy moly.. all in 2 rooms!! Gotta love it!! It shall be fun!! I will post lots of pictures from our overcrowded hotel rooms! well im goin to go for now.. i have got to finish the kids laundry!

Until later.. xo